Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
