He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
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