I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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