so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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