what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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