that's an acceptable place to lick
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
