Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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