i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
the room spins SO much faster in panama
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize