if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize