i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
