gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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