He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
50% drunk capacity currently
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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