So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
