Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
how does that bad decision feel?
Randomize