put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize