I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize
