therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
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