no, he came in my armpit
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
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