I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
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