i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
