So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Randomize
