Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
