that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize
