Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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