i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Randomize
