My lunch today consisted of going on the brewery tour with my boss. Free pretzels and two free beers.
I hate you.
To be fair, the beers are only 8 ounces each. So maybe you just kinda dislike me.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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