Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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