You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
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