They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Everything about him screamed your future.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
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