We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Randomize
