Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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