i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize
