I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
