the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
i out mim tonsoeep
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