The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize
