I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
my liver is dry heaving
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
