You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Randomize
