Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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