I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
