We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
