I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
