I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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