"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Randomize
