is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
