That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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