so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
