I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Randomize
