Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
Randomize
