After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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