I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
